I have a special friend named Patty. Patty’s grandchildren attended the same school as my kids and we met when we both volunteered at the school. Patty served 20 years in the Air Force and retired several years ago from her position at the City of Tucson. Her time is spent helping care for her 3 grandchildren, as well as volunteering at her church. We haven’t known each other long but we quickly became friends and you will understand why she is so special to me.
Last year in my local foster care Facebook group, a lady asked if anyone could watch her foster son starting at 2am and then bring him to school several times a week for a month, due to a work schedule change. No one responded. I felt bad for the lady, so I asked Patty if she could help out a foster mom needing help in an odd situation. I wasn’t sure how she would feel about it because it was so early in the morning but I figured it doesn’t hurt to ask. To my delight, she said yes!
Last month, I got an email about a dire situation for a teen foster boy who needed a ride to and from school every morning for a month. His foster mom could not provide transportation due to her work schedule and distance, as it was a 35-minute drive one way to the school. His case manager was desperately looking for a solution.
Initially, I was hesitant to ask Patty, as it is a long drive one way each morning for a month with no compensation. That’s a lot to ask. But again, I felt that I needed to at least try to help and I figured it wouldn’t hurt. I called her and told her about the situation and her response was “I can do mornings but not afternoons because I am watching my grandkids”. I said I know it’s a lot to ask and she replied, “Well, it’s only for a month. I don’t mind”. I told her there is no payment for her time or gas and she said “That’s ok. It doesn’t matter.” Her generosity was so huge, I couldn’t help but cry with gratitude.
Yesterday, I got a call from Patty telling me that this is the last week of her driving him to school. She told me that spending time with this teen has been such a gift to her. She spoke of what an incredible young man he was. During one of their conversations, she asked him how he is able to have such a positive outlook after all that he has gone through at such a young age. He told Patty, “I was sad for a long time, but one day I woke up and I decided to be happy!” Patty said it has taken her over 60 years to figure that out and this remarkable young man has figured it out already!
Working in child welfare is hard sometimes. There are so many situations and decisions that are beyond our control. Especially knowing that a decision is based on the legal process, not necessarily what’s best for the child. It is easy to get burned-out and be bitter. It is easy to not see possibility in situations and think the worst. So when someone like Patty steps up, it provides much needed inspiration and hope.
When I shared this experience with my foster care agency, we were so inspired, we decided to create The Patty Project. We know there are individuals out there, who given the chance to make a difference for a child, would gladly do it. We need more Pattys in this world!
Mea Sparks 