Mother

I reunited with my birth family and met my birth Mother when I was 22 years old. What I remember the most about that meeting was how sad she looked. I tried to convince her that she didn’t have to feel sad about me. I was adopted into a good family. I have a good life. I have lots of opportunities (I was put up for adoption because I have a 3rd degree burn on my arm). But nothing I said made a difference and her sadness was unwavering.

A decade later, I had my first child. I looked into my child’s eyes and understood her sadness. I couldn’t fathom not being able to keep my child or miss seeing him grow up. That’s when I realized that her sadness was permanently hers and there was nothing I could EVER say or do to take that away from her. That is her burden and honor as my Mother that she will carry with her always.  I could only understand this as a Mother.